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Home » Marriage » why is it so difficult to find a wife? Messages in this topic - RSS
11/13/2010 4:52:45 PM
junni08
Posts 1
its because we all are being materialistic now. guys looks around for facial and physical beauty more than Taqwa and girls look around for financially established guys. and we both (girls and guys) have physical requirements more (she should be slim, whitish skin, big eyes, should be that much tall, he should be tall, muscular,own house, shouldn't ask for kids in the first 3-4 years of marriage, i want to make a professional career and he should resist. etc etc etc) this is the reason for no one being fitting in the bill for us
9/1/2011 2:37:17 AM

Posts
naeemikram wrote:
Assalamo Alaikum,
From my point of view its really hard to find your betterhalf becuase so many aspects stand between this kind of relationship for a male. Women normally do not reply in the timely manner. But they're precautions for the Mulimahs to find a good better half. its true according to circumstances today. i.e Visa seekers, bluffers etc. its not allowed in our deen. to cheat some one. and its also true all the five fingers are not equal....best thing way for both male/female to pray to ALLAH S.W.T to show us the right path...


Well said brother.
9/1/2011 2:39:13 AM

Posts
It's NOT difficult to find a wife. It's difficult to find a good wife.
9/1/2011 1:22:48 PM
justlooking2
Posts 1
junni08 wrote:
its because we all are being materialistic now. guys looks around for facial and physical beauty more than Taqwa and girls look around for financially established guys. and we both (girls and guys) have physical requirements more (she should be slim, whitish skin, big eyes, should be that much tall, he should be tall, muscular,own house, shouldn't ask for kids in the first 3-4 years of marriage, i want to make a professional career and he should resist. etc etc etc) this is the reason for no one being fitting in the bill for us


Well said Junni bro. Girls are looking for Prince charming with a Lots of money and guys are looking for Miss world. and both parities dont realise that not everyones prince charming with a lot of money or a Miss World.... We both Brothers and sisters should be more concern about Our Deen than this dunia nothing lasts forever neither beauty nor the money.
in the End the only thing matters is Your deen and taqwa!
10/1/2011 10:05:05 AM
h4x3r101
Posts 1
The problem is that depending on how the woman or man is raised you will find all kinds of personalities and priorities.

most women think if a man is well educated and rich then they are set for life, instead of finding someone who will love them for who they are, they want someone to love them for how they look or who her family is or any superficial reason.

I know not all women are the same just as I know that also some men are shallow just as some women are.

So the answer here is simple, we need to stop looking at all the fake appearances and the superficial life styles and start looking for someone who will help and love you rich or poor, fat or thing, tall or short, to love you for who you are and how you make them feel.

Sadly it's easier said than done, and at the end of the day, the way of the life style of the society we live in still wins at the end.
11/12/2011 1:56:23 AM
hazukam
Posts 1
I VERY MUCH AGREE.
THE DUA' TO ALLAH IS IMPORTANT AND YOU JUST HAVE TO BE PATIENT OR TRY SOME OTHER MEANS. SISTERS HERE IN THE UK ARE VERY HARD TO APPROACH AND FOR SOMEONE LIVING ON YOUR OWN YOU CAN SPEND YEARS IN A SINGLE LIFE.

IN THE UK PAKISTANIS DON'T REALLY WANT THEIR CHILDREN TO MARRY BLACK OR WHITE PEOPLE EVEN IF YOU ARE A MUSLIM. SAME WITH INDIANS THEY HAVE THAT MADNESS OF RACISM OR MAY BE IT IS TRIBALISM I DON'T KNOW.

I HAVE BEEN SEARCHING ON THIS SITE FOR ABOUT 1 YEAR AND A HALF. BUT INSHA ALLAH ONE DAY I WILL FIND THE LOVE OF MY LIFE. OTHERWISE IF YOU WANNA MARRY BY MEETING PEOPLE IN YOUR COMMUNITY THEN YOU MIGHT NOT GET ANY UNLESS YOU ARE ASIAN.

I MIGHT BE WRONG BUT THIS IS THE REALLITY WE FACE IN THE UK. WE ARE EVEN FORCED TO THINK ABOUT MARRYING NON-MUSLIMS ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU REALISE YOU ARE ALREADY IN YOUR 30s AND STILL SINGLE.
6/18/2012 1:55:30 AM
gray_eyez
Posts 3
its difficult to find a good partner, there are many time wasters and scammers and lyers here in this site. thats y i prefer to look myself to contact the brothers because many have secret lives and looking for fun in the side. internet u must be careful.
6/19/2012 5:48:35 PM
whoami
Posts 1
This the third site I am using. The first two are full of scammers and gamers, I don't expect this one to be any better. It is unfortunate that many of us, male or female, expect the future partner to look like some supermodel. A terrible expectation indeed.
7/10/2012 3:14:39 AM
Ray1
Posts 9
this is very true. the problem is that there is trend of late marriages now. men for their career and even females for education and then jobs. once both are mature they start looking at very little short comings and become very selective.
my experince being a female been really worse as i found most of the men not interested for a modest relation of wedding they were looking some freinds, this is extremly hateful act and shame on these sort of people. then high expectations from both sides. families are fail to get good proposals as the families who visit, they see a girl like an embroidered dress that whether she has all 5000 beads on or not, the complexion tone, age and all. then i thought to register on this website but still got disappointment. May Allah be kind on us.
9/27/2012 4:07:05 AM
haniya20divorced
Posts 2
its nt hard your just too fussy :P
1/13/2013 6:56:52 AM
ngunaratna
Posts 2
Because women, are very choosy. Because I'm, very choosy. But if you think you can handle it, come.
1/13/2013 6:57:10 AM
ngunaratna
Posts 2
CAN YOU HANDLE THE TRUTH
1/31/2013 9:16:32 AM
abdelmumin
Posts 2
Assalamu alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh,

I think the answer is simple not complex

Most of us muslims are very far away from the din and we follow our desires and the kufar

We think whatever they say is cool then we say that is cool and when we look upon Islam some among us actually look at what Islam enjoys with some sort of disdain astaghfirullah

Most families want MONEY for their daughters

The guy can be making his whole money from haram but for them they don't see nothing wrong with this, they see only the among of money he makes and they don't care if the guy will not be a good husband for their daughter and I have seen some families who have broken marriages apart because they prefer their daughter to be a prostitute and bring money to them then to be marry and live a halal marriage life with very little means

I think we must all go back to the din and when we want to choose a partner we do it the pure islamic way and we find mates that will fear Allah

Allah the mighty and Majestic said (what translated means):

And whoever fears Allah and keeps his duty to Him, He will make a way for him to get out (from every difficulty) and He will provide him from sources he never could imagine. [Sura At-Talaaq 65:2-3]

So brothers and sisters don't despair make patience and keep your duty to Allah that He will make a way for you and inshaallah give you a great spouse

To the sisters please be upon to share a righteous husband

To the brothers please don't follow your wife in things when she prohibits you from marrying another sister if you have the means as you can be a protection to another sister or sisters

Wa Allahu alam
edited by abdelmumin on 1/31/2013
6/30/2013 3:25:55 PM
kenanshaikh
Posts 1
I like what you just said...Agreed, Have to change our thinking style
7/5/2013 5:54:41 AM
furndjsssd
Posts 1
please marry me bro , am bare rich and shaged 3 sheep
7/5/2013 5:25:08 PM
plusola
Posts 1
For all singles just have the believe that if we are destine to get married in this life with a kids too will surely have the dream mates both on earth and the hereafter.
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