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Home » Marriage » what does it take to marry? Messages in this topic - RSS
7/5/2010 7:57:42 PM

Posts
Well i've only been muslim for 6 years now but i know how important it is to marry in islam. I am the only muslim in my family so its not like i have the arranged weddings with parents and other family members, or the recommendation of approval from people that i have close relationships with in the ummah. I am a traveler. I had to leave my home and search for my religion. Its difficult to just walk into a masjid and say " as salaamu alaikom. I wish to marry someone from this ummah to protect myself and my religion. will you help me?" they look at me like I DONT KNOW YOU.. and it feels ( or is ) haram to just approach a muslimah one on one. why is it so difficult to marry? what does it take for a person to see that a muslim man is willing to protect his deen. Why won't they help him. Its like nobody really cares anymore. Insha Allah things will work out
7/8/2010 10:05:09 AM
indonesianlady
Posts 4
Well, I think at first you must be friends with those Muslims first before you ask their favor to help you find a wife. Be genuine with them and be honest with who you are. Join their activities. Hang out with them. Show them that you're a good Muslim.

Once they know you and learn to trust you, I'm sure they will try to help you out.

Hope things will work out well for you.
8/11/2011 12:28:37 AM
moslimguy
Posts 6
relroher wrote:
Well i've only been muslim for 6 years now but i know how important it is to marry in islam. I am the only muslim in my family so its not like i have the arranged weddings with parents and other family members, or the recommendation of approval from people that i have close relationships with in the ummah. I am a traveler. I had to leave my home and search for my religion. Its difficult to just walk into a masjid and say " as salaamu alaikom. I wish to marry someone from this ummah to protect myself and my religion. will you help me?" they look at me like I DONT KNOW YOU.. and it feels ( or is ) haram to just approach a muslimah one on one. why is it so difficult to marry? what does it take for a person to see that a muslim man is willing to protect his deen. Why won't they help him. Its like nobody really cares anymore. Insha Allah things will work out


now I hope you got marraied ,
but if still not then I pray for you,
what U said its true lil bit , but this because many moslims dont follow the instrucctions of Islam very well.
3/26/2012 9:24:55 AM
bluelight
Posts 5
actually travelling and where you live and people know you very much closely and they can check and verify you and your character and what you earn and financially how much you are establish and your family and other members and what is your future theoretical and practical marriage role then convincing the female and their family an bonding relation of marriage can comes in existence

due to at this time you cannot trust anyone ANYONE

so travelling or job like that you can find persons and families and if not then leave the travelling and achieve this target and proceed further

wasalam
3/30/2012 11:17:37 PM
sawdah
Posts 2
Aslamaleikum Warahmatullahi wabarakatu
Dear akhwanul muslimina wal muslimat, In this modern world,we muslim have little time for each other but more time for the wordly that is why we are facing this type of issues.The mosques are suppose to be institutes for prayer bonding between muslims,helpline centres and various other issues that touches the muslim society.The mosques should be more friendly to both muslims and non-muslims,should have activities such as family centre affairs that caters for problems affecting families,marriege centres for counselling married cuoples,youth affairs that will touc issues affecting todays youth,gender,etc and I am certain the difficulty as experienced by "smiles" will be less.I know of several mosques in our country that opearate on this basis,such that if you fall sick and miss swalat,the Imam will personally come to visit you.anyhow lets pray for the best and I pray you have found the right person.
7/6/2013 7:43:46 AM

Posts
relroher wrote:
Well i've only been muslim for 6 years now but i know how important it is to marry in islam. I am the only muslim in my family so its not like i have the arranged weddings with parents and other family members, or the recommendation of approval from people that i have close relationships with in the ummah. I am a traveler. I had to leave my home and search for my religion. Its difficult to just walk into a masjid and say " as salaamu alaikom. I wish to marry someone from this ummah to protect myself and my religion. will you help me?" they look at me like I DONT KNOW YOU.. and it feels ( or is ) haram to just approach a muslimah one on one. why is it so difficult to marry? what does it take for a person to see that a muslim man is willing to protect his deen. Why won't they help him. Its like nobody really cares anymore. Insha Allah things will work out


dear bro just be patient allah will guided you to your fate and, I'm with u there are some families complicate the marriage process and this is not what islam says at all. i hope allah guided all these people amin
12/23/2013 5:45:01 AM
AliLasVegas
Posts 2
I can empathize with you unfortunately culture taints the worldly Islam of today. Having been to KSA and spending time w/ the locals(40 days) I gained a whole new perspective of this deen. Surprisingly in nearly all areas I was positively influenced--except the marriage/looking part. In my case there was A LOT of stress put into the word DOWRY, while there was less concerning, Taqwah or Iman. I run into it even here. In the end...my best advice is, pray Ishtikara, fast, supplicate and try to practice As Sabr...nothing happens unless he (ASW) wills. It gets lonely....in my case, the majority of those I came in contact with, family, friends and associate...gradually pulled away or like my Father, cut me out of their lives...and there's the whole "I want to fit in" scenario most converts go through. I am of the opinion now that our happiness and feelings of self worth should never be rooted on the opinions, approvals or endorsements from others....so I try to draw nearer to Allah & can never say Alhamdulilah enough-for if my life ended 5 minutes from now I would be the luckiest guy in Las Vegas! If insahallah I die in a state of Al-Islam.....the rest is secondary.

Fi amanillah.
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